TEACHER: Why are you late?
STUDENT: Class started before I got here.
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘ I. ‘
MILLIE: I is…
TEACHER: No, Millie. Always say, ‘I am.’
MILLIE: All right… ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, sir. It’s the same dog.
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.
Humor is an important part of our education and of our life. It helps us build positive relationships and overcome judgment. Laughter works very well to quell small irritations. That way little things don’t build into big things.
*Sent to me by my friend Jonie P. ( a teacher of course). Taken from the internet, it is originally listed as "British Humour Is Delightfully Different." Author unknown.